Nicole makes poetry of a fraught relationship.
The Mmm of Her

Nicole makes poetry of a fraught relationship.
Nicole remembers being more beautiful.
He had a way
of bringing beauty
to the filthiest things,
and I have yet
to be as beautiful
as I was with him.
© Nicole Lyons 2017
LuckyOtter actually witnessed a Trump voter change his mind.
Trump supporters have been burning their MAGA hats lately, but not exactly for laudable reasons. To them, Trump has betrayed them by saying he will work with Democrats (even though I doubt he’ll actually do this since he lies about everything). If Trump has been losing his allure to some white supremacists and other members of the alt-right, it’s not because they are finally seeing him as the dangerous authoritarian despot he actually is, but because to them, by agreeing to work with Democrats, Trump has proven himself to be a RINO (Republican In Name Only) and therefore a traitor to their nationalist, anti-immigration sentiments.
But here and there, some people who voted for Trump are beginning to realize they made a mistake. Most of them seem embarrassed by this. They don’t like to talk about it, which gives the initial impression that Trump supporters have not changed…
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Beth Caplin comments on “divisiveness”.
Facebook’s “On this Day” feature recently reminded me of a conversation in response to one of my older blog posts. That particular blog no longer exists, but the content of the post in question was later republished as this post: a response to students at my seminary who believed God wanted me in the Messianic Judaism program instead of counseling.
One response came from a former professor we’ll call H:
My problem lies not with H’s comment as a whole, but rather her last line that reads a bit like a scolding for not “looking for unity” in the Body of Christ, and instead “promoting one [denomination] over another.”
Years later, my thoughts in my blog post still stand. They are backed by personal experience, and are perfectly valid. No one gets to discredit them simply because it makes them look bad, or hurts their feelings.
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Devon calls out theft.
Sam has strategies for dealing with being alone.
My partner is gone for the remainder of the week, leaving abruptly on the heels of a family tragedy. And at first, I’m convinced I will be fine.
I have new medications. I have a wonderful cat. I have friends, and Netflix, and books to read.
“This won’t be so hard,” I tell myself. “It might even be fun.”
But the second night alone, I’m having a full-blown panic attack. And I’m so ashamed of it that I resist reaching out for help, for fear of embarrassing myself and confirming my friends’ suspicions that I’m too crazy, or too needy, or both.
At first, I feel ridiculous, because “normal” people can be alone. “Normal” people don’t think twice about it, apparently.
But here I am, laying on the floor of my apartment, hyperventilating because my OCD has whipped me into a frenzy. I can’t stop thinking about how I might…
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Sam writes on ways to support those we care about.
I was watching Disney’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame when I felt myself starting to panic.
Right from the start, seeing Quasimodo be the recipient of so much gaslighting – being told that the world wasn’t safe, that he would never be accepted or loved, that Frollo had only his best interest at heart – struck a jarring but familiar chord with me.
Quasimodo’s isolation in the bell tower, unable to leave or connect with the outside world, eerily mirrored the control and entrapment I’d experienced years before.
“Hey,” my partner said softly, pausing the film. “Sam, you’re safe. It’s okay. But if this is too much, I’m more than happy to watch something else.”
In the midst of an emotional flashback, my fears were disrupted by my partner’s tender assurances. I could only nod. Without another word, my partner put on Steven Universe – my go-to show, having watched…
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C. Streetlights – What has been done violently cannot be undone, unlived.
Nicole wonders, do you?
Sometimes the memories become too much,
and I wonder if you have locked me away
as I have you.
And if every now and again I begin kicking
through the walls of your mind,
overwhelming you,
and if I do I wonder if you quietly surrender,
or if you furiously gasp for air
when the regret takes you under, too.
© Nicole Lyons 2017
Syn Dolly on evolving as a submissive. I wonder what it says that when I first glanced at the title in my email notices I read it as Evolution Of A Subversive. Hmmmm
Contemplations From A Black Star Citizen.
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