Time of You

Stephanie Bennett-Henry – a sleepless night, a busy mind, and who’s not there

Stephanie Bennett-Henry

It is 1:00am

when my thoughts refuse to settle,

when I analyze every detail of my life,

when I start thinking of you again.

It is 2:00am

when I’m still wide awake for no reason

other than you and all the details of you

I have memorized deep in my bones.

It is 3:00am

and I’m still here with my mind like a curse

I wouldn’t put on my worst enemy.

I study every scenario of rights and wrongs,

what I should’ve done differently,

what I could’ve done better,

and all I would still change if only.

If only you were here I tell myself,

I would be fast asleep

not questioning anything at all.

It is 4:00am

and I may as well stay up now.

My eyes fear the closure, the dark,

the silence, while my thoughts

create anxiety that won’t allow sleep.

And here I am again with…

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