HASTY – It creeps in and grows in the dark.
I woke up after a long night of tossing and turning. Dreams of self-hate, disrespect, mistrust and betrayal. It felt… familiar. Like the beginning of something I still had control of.
Once I woke I identified the core feelings I needed to work on. Now I’ll work through them and get a nap later. Depression is like mold in that it starts out lurking and growing in dark places. Places you choose not to look. It gathers intelligence and stockpiles all the things you try to avoid so later when you are the most worn out… it can attack you with ALL the things.
Depression is chemical. It’s important to understand it isn’t something you can control with willpower. You can’t just BE happy.
But I believe (only my opinion) avoiding feelings, ignoring thoughts, and not working through issues is like starving yourself to feed the monster. And eventually when…
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